Sunday, March 30, 2014

Label Your Day

Label Your Day

I conquered the grocery store the other day. I put my labeling technique to use. I was pushing my empty cart up and down the aisles. I wasn’t even hungry (thank goodness…we all know you can’t go there when hungry). I’m trying to drink less soda (because I drink WAY TOO MUCH of it). I had no more in the house. So….when I came upon the soda aisle, I looked at my trusty friend (diet coke) and labeled him, “poison” (truth, Google it) and just walked right on by. (Talk about strength!)

Next was the cereal aisle. Not in need of any “gluten” today, thank you very much. Whew. Next challenge? Wine label. Easy peezee: “Bad. For. My. Skin.” It was at this moment that I had that “how proud am I?” moment. Feeling quite superhero-ish by now.

Have you ever noticed that the displays at the ends of the aisles are the worst? I have no problem with those powdered sugar donuts (unless they are in my pantry) or Oreos (have you ever heard where the fat for the yummy centers comes from?) but there’s still some things that are on my “gotta have it” list. I was pretending I was having to give up something, so I was trying to give up everything. That usually back fires on me but this day I got through it. I did pick up chocolate, though. There’s no other label for chocolate except “OhMyGoodnessHowYummyIsThis!!!

So labeling works! Let’s talk about Labeling Your Day. When you wake up in the morning, if you are anything like me, you know what needs the most attention that day, besides work, children and (always) laundry. Before your head is off of your pillow and your feet hit the floor, label your day with the items that you want to get done that day. I’m happy to report that today I got it ALL done. (And that never happens.) I labeled my day first thing this morning, “accomplishment.”  I had a list in the kitchen that I’d see while preparing breakfast so I knew what that would entail. You may have days where you just want to fly by the seat of your pants. I highly recommend labeling it, instead. Even if it’s to label your day as “play day, relax day, or peaceful day.” 

Maybe you have drawers that have been calling your name out for days or weeks. Clean and organize them but first label your day “organization.” Organize the drawers, emails, digital photos on the computer (including saving them to another form of back-up…we all know why), laundry day, errand day, pet care day (baths, toenails clipped). We all have a constant streaming to-do list running through our heads of things needing immediate attention. What is THE one thing (or two things) that you'd love to have done at day's end? Label your day as such.


When you label your day first thing, you will feel more motivated and have a sense of direction instantly. And once those items are taken care of and you meet yourself back at your pillow again later that night, you will feel accomplishedThat’s a pleasant feeling at the end of a day. Even if the house is still a mess and you forgot to schedule dental appointments once again, your goal has been met. Success! Make your day conquerable. And then go conquer it. ~~~Katherine A. Rayne~~~  www.backtobeingawoman.com

Monday, March 24, 2014

pro-choice but anti-abortion


I saw a bumper sticker the other day that was supportive of anti-abortion. I always find these stickers bordering on the quite-offensive. To anybody. Too many graphic images and successful efforts of inducing disturbing thoughts. I know this is on purpose. We want to save another sweet life. (There is no question as to WHEN it becomes a child. That happens at conception…we shouldn’t try to fool ourselves into thinking otherwise.) But. If we are sending messages out to the world for good, shouldn’t we be making sure that it’s conducive to spreading Knowledge, Truth AND Peace? I know the authors of these stickers are diligently trying to make a difference in our world by saving one more baby. I give thanks for that. But no one says that they have to be mean about it. The bumper sticker I saw the other day was Kind. Thoughtful and Decent. And of course I can’t remember it, but it said something to the effect of,

"Don't let me go. Hold my hand instead,"
with a tiny image of a newborn. These are words a sweet soul might whisper into her mother’s ear during that difficult time of decision making. That made sense. I didn’t take offense.

I could not choose abortion. But I also feel very strongly that the government has no business deciding a woman’s extremely personal decision for her. If abortion was illegal, we know that women all over the world would still find a way to abort it if she really wanted to. It wouldn’t stop it from happening. I don’t think it’s up to us to make her feel bad about her decision, either. I’m pretty sure she feels bad already. Remember the “no judging” clause? So I refuse to judge a woman on her decisions. (I would definitely feel like judging whoever invented the idea of abortion. I can only imagine the public outcry when it first emerged.)

An unwanted pregnancy can definitely be a negative, for many. But adoption would make so much more sense out of it, for everyone. It could be turned into a positive. First by not aborting and second by giving a family a child they’ve been waiting on for more than the brief nine months that it takes to carry one. Either way, this decision is going to be so hard for any woman, but something very good can come out of it if the baby is saved.
      
        1)   Someone will gain a cute little family member
       2)  The biological mom will have the opportunity in about 18 years, to meet their kindred little one, all grown up and wondering about her, too.
       3)  You get to keep your Choice; yours. Will I one day see my child, or won’t I? When a baby is adopted out, the birth mother has more and more say-so over how they want to hand over their child.
  
     "I want contact.   I don’t want contact.  I want to know their name.  I want to know where they live.   I don’t.   I want to be able to get in touch with them when they are of age.     I don’t."
Don’t sever choices. If a child is aborted, all of those future choices will disappear with the baby.

Yes, we want fewer abortions in the world. But keep the government and the cruel thoughts out of it. Keep the Kindness in all of our decisions. Kindness towards girls and woman with difficult decisions that lay ahead. Kindness towards a child that was meant to be. Kindness to spread the word. And the Love. Share the LOVE.  ~~~Katherine A. Rayne~~~  www.backtobeingawoman~~~

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Worrying is Stupid...

Worrying is Stupid. It's like walking around with an umbrella waiting for it to rain.  Wiz Khalifa

I came across this quote today and decided I must share it. I want to relieve women of worry it seems, so this comparison of worry to an unnecessary umbrella is inspiration for me (and my worries). I have never heard of Mr. Wiz Khalifa until today, but after dutifully Googling him, I found that "Wiz" is his nickname because of his wisdom, and that he likes cannabis. I find his words inspiring enough to quote, regardless of his habits. Because it is truthful. I know this because of my habits. A worrier. I want our inner light to calm and suffocate our worries. Because it really is wasteful. Our energies can be better utilized if we think, breathe and focus on something better. Something more useful. In my book, Back To Being A Woman (Without Changing the Man), one of my chapters discuss our confidence within ourselves in all areas, including our physical traits. We each know what we dislike about our body. Big nose, small breasts, thick thighs, surgical scars. And I can compare worry to the negative focus we put on our physical traits that we aren't happy with. Stop focusing on those traits of yourself. Don't let them overshadow all of your best features. Let your good traits stand up and shine. Worry does not have to be a part of your day. You can shove it off to the side so that your intelligence and common sense can come through. So that ideas of what your day will entail can push forward. Why worry about that meeting? Why worry about what's for dinner? Why worry that you didn't get to the gym once again? Why worry that you are running late in traffic? That ten minutes of worry won't fix it for you or improve upon it. You will still be in the same dilemma as before you began to worry. What if you focus on how you are going to limit that situation in the future? Set a plan. Or just let them go. The moments will pass. Think about better things. Acknowledge that dinner will still taste good, no matter what you decide to have. Remember that the meeting will happen, ready or not. Take it in stride. 

Our days will always have challenges. Accept the challenges, including the unplanned ones. Have the confidence that you will make it through, just as you have every other day of your life. They are such small matters in the context of life. Life is so much bigger than the worry we create for ourselves. Soooo much bigger. Create a habit of positives. Look for the good, even in the bad. Ask yourself what is the silver lining. And reflect it onto your day. ~~Katherine A. Rayne~~  www.backtobeingawoman.com